On rare occasions I am referred to as a Drama Queen. Oh who am I kidding, it may be rare that I am told this, but frankly I think it is said daily out of my ear shot. But were I lost for for words (god forbid), I would not be lost for other methods of expression, thanks to the wonderful tutelage of true stars like Pola Negri.

It is not so much her wardrobe I admire, but those other wonderful elements that make her a stylish woman. Her mannerisms. The way she tilts her head, eyes closed, as if her own presence is a delicious treat. A cigarette between her fingers becomes a prop that is used to indicate disdain, indulgence or passion.

For a dose of instant silent screen queen drama in your day try these tricks.

• Make up your eyes, darkly and dramatically. Practice your withering glances in the mirror till you can drop a man at ten paces.

• Wear gloves with everything, even in summer. Not only will they give your outfit an edge, you can use them to hail a cab, keep the suns damaging rays from your delicate skin, or to protect your hands from beard rash when you slap that rogue of a man.

• In these days when smoking is banned most everywhere, find yourself another useful prop. Take to carrying a fan that can be folded in your hand. It is perfect for glancing up behind, gesticulating with and hitting uncooperative shops assistants.

Next time you feel your confidence flagging, close your eyes and imagine you’re a woman like Pola.

As a child I really loved movies, (I still do). I used to kick off my Mary Janes and sit in my tights after church, watching Grace Kelly, Ava Gardner and Cary Grant. I loved nothing better than the Golden Years of Hollywood type of picture, (as is probably evidenced by my style). And while I have many favorites within this genre, Aunty Mame would have to be one of my tops. Not just for the heart stopping costumes, the lavish sets or snappy dialogue, but for the woman herself. Immortalized in the 1956 picture with Rosalind Russell, Mame was the kind of Aunt I wished I had and hoped to become. Every day for her was an occasion. She was generous with her time, her money and her spirit. She made aging seem like a journey to decadence and indulgence, a secret club you can only hope one day to join. She had an astounding presence, and was able to drop a rival with a single glance. She was Fierce, Fabulous and Flawless. Oh, and she had Monkeys at her parties!

“Swathed in chinchilla, trailing a mist of French perfume, balancing an elegant cigarette holder between perfectly manicured fingers and chattering away, Mame is an emblem of glamorous enlightenment — the kind of aunt who lets you drink champagne through a straw, explains jazz to you and lets you stay up at an adult party until you keel over.” Quote from Misha Berson of the Sunday times

It seems that there are really only two types of Mums around here. Either you fit the mold of the Stay-At-Home mum, wearing your ‘good’ jeans for play dates and hair in a scrappy pony tail every day, while hanging out for a little ‘me time’ to do more scrap booking. Or those trying so (obviously) hard to be a ‘Yummy Mummy’, wearing so much bling they can barely lift their arms, and with acrylic nails so long it is surprising their children still have their eye sight. Now, I’m not knocking these mums for what they are (maybe just a little), but it can be a somewhat lonely journey as the only one wearing a fur trimmed coat and 4 inch Westwood style heels, to a winter play date. I do see some wonderfully stylish mothers in blog land, and in the fantasy that is celebrity-ville, but where are the rest? Should I be the only one at the supermarket with children in tow that doesn’t look like I have been dragged backwards through a hedge?
Women of the past seemed to manage having children and dressing up in the same breath. What happened? It seems that comfort has become the enemy of style.

When it comes to stylish Mama’s, one of my favorite gals is the indomitable Esther Williams. While she has a long list of film credits to her name, it is her private life that interests me more. Married four times, Esther was not shy is chasing what she wanted. Her autobiography, “Million Dollar Mermaid” is a wonderful read into the scandalous and surprising world of Hollywood at the time, (I highly recommend it). But not only is Esther an actress, world class swimmer and stunning beauty; she is also a mama to three. She is a wonderful example of just how glamorous a mother can be, while still having fun with her kids. Even while teaching them to swim she still manages to look gorgeous and put together. Although I have to admit that she has a lot of practice at looking fabulous in the water.

These days, at 86, Esther is still a model of polish and poise. I can only hope I look this immaculate at her age.

So my call to all the mamas out there is this. Having children does not negate you having a sense of style. Whether you wear cashmere or cotton, you will still get cereal on both, but only one will make you feel like a million dollars. So worth the extra laundry.